Monday, September 8, 2014

The Internet Quiz I Haven't Seen Yet



If you have been on Facebook recently you might have been tempted to take an online quiz, you know that silly link one of your friends fell victim to and proudly posted their score from to their timeline. These quizzes can give you a plethora of "valuable" insight into your personality, secret desires, and hidden tendencies. You might want to determine which Pride and Prejudice character you are most like, how old you really are at heart, which religion you should belong to, which country you should live in, or even better, what your I.Q. is. And the best part of these quizzes is that you can get results after a few tedious minutes and answering only about six to ten questions! If that isn't handy, I don't know what is.

Since my experience with taking these random quizzes is somewhat limited, I did a little research. BuzzFeed has quite an impressive line up of ways to make yourself delve into the hidden recesses of your personality, habits, and long lost (probably on purpose) useless knowledge. If you visit this site, be prepared to jump into finding out how kinky you really are (don't follow this link unless you really want to know - ewww), how introverted you are, how well you know the animal kingdom, where you should have your Disney themed wedding take place, and even if you really exist. The possibilities for self discovery seem to be endless! Note that I have only listed some of the quizzes I actually understood. There were plenty that might as well have been written in another language. That is how up-to-date I am NOT. For example, the quiz called "What Completely Random Jaden Smith Tweet Best Represents Your Soul" was waaaaaay over my head and waaaaay under my age group.

As part of my research, I took a quiz called "The Hardest SNL Quiz You Will Ever Take"; and yes, it was the hardest one I've ever taken, because I've never taken one before. I scored a sorry 7 out of 20, so I guess that definitely proves that I am not a Saturday Night Live expert by any means, and my infrequent late night watching in the 70s was poor preparation. I declined taking the quiz called "How Well Do You Know Fractions" because, well, I actually already know the results of that one - not well at all.

The one internet quiz that I haven't seen displayed on my Facebook news feed yet is the "How Much Time and Brain Cells Are You Wasting By Taking Internet Quizzes?" one. I am totally guilty of wasting time on the internet, especially with Facebook, but I am going to have to draw the line on these quizzes people! The few times I have succumbed to boredom and indulged in an internet quiz here and there have been very unsatisfying and even destructive at times. The self-esteem damage that has been done is shameful when my score is lower than yours, and of course I don't ever post my results. Since when did we need an internet quiz to tell us how creative, bossy, or decisive we are?! I can't even decide which Disney princess I would want on my spy team, let alone which style of dog house fits with my pet's personality best. Isn't that what Pinterest is for?

You know, these so-called "quiz writers" don't bother to include their credentials with their scam exams, so I don't think we need to look to these assessments as the final word on our God given gifts. I don't want just any old internet person to know what kind of Mac 'N' Cheese I should be eating right now, so privacy could also be an issue. And then there's the fact that I've never been a good competitor; I am more of the group hostess type who makes sure everyone feels welcome and validated while they are taking the quiz.  And besides that, how does one study for such quizzes? They just appear in my news feed without warning. Am I supposed to shut down everything and cram for the test on Project Runway All Stars? Whew, that is just too much pressure, so I'm just letting you all know that I will be opting out of this semi secret competition that very well could be destroying lives everywhere and forcing people to confront their pop culture stupidity. I am going to have to say no to the late night study sessions for the Elizabeth Taylor 101 quiz and my Brangelina IQ assessment. Besides, I have so many good books to read and such a small amount of time. I think I will just get back to my careful reading of The Rent Collector now . . . you know . . . so I can check to see if there is an online quiz on it that I can ace.