The Internet Quiz I Haven't Seen Yet

If you have been on Facebook recently you might have been tempted to take an online quiz, you know that silly link one of your friends fell victim to and proudly posted their score from to their timeline. These quizzes can give you a plethora of "valuable" insight into your personality, secret desires, and hidden tendencies. You might want to determine which Pride and Prejudice character you are most like, how old you really are at heart, which religion you should belong to, which country you should live in, or even better, what your I.Q. is. And the best part of these quizzes is that you can get results after a few tedious minutes and answering only about six to ten questions! If that isn't handy, I don't know what is.

Since my experience with taking these random quizzes is somewhat limited, I did a little research. BuzzFeed has quite an impressive line up of ways to make yourself delve into the hidden recesses of your personality, habits, and long lost (probably on purpose) useless knowledge. If you visit this site, be prepared to jump into finding out how kinky you really are (don't follow this link unless you really want to know - ewww), how introverted you are, how well you know the animal kingdom, where you should have your Disney themed wedding take place, and even if you really exist. The possibilities for self discovery seem to be endless! Note that I have only listed some of the quizzes I actually understood. There were plenty that might as well have been written in another language. That is how up-to-date I am NOT. For example, the quiz called "What Completely Random Jaden Smith Tweet Best Represents Your Soul" was waaaaaay over my head and waaaaay under my age group.

As part of my research, I took a quiz called "The Hardest SNL Quiz You Will Ever Take"; and yes, it was the hardest one I've ever taken, because I've never taken one before. I scored a sorry 7 out of 20, so I guess that definitely proves that I am not a Saturday Night Live expert by any means, and my infrequent late night watching in the 70s was poor preparation. I declined taking the quiz called "How Well Do You Know Fractions" because, well, I actually already know the results of that one - not well at all.

The one internet quiz that I haven't seen displayed on my Facebook news feed yet is the "How Much Time and Brain Cells Are You Wasting By Taking Internet Quizzes?" one. I am totally guilty of wasting time on the internet, especially with Facebook, but I am going to have to draw the line on these quizzes people! The few times I have succumbed to boredom and indulged in an internet quiz here and there have been very unsatisfying and even destructive at times. The self-esteem damage that has been done is shameful when my score is lower than yours, and of course I don't ever post my results. Since when did we need an internet quiz to tell us how creative, bossy, or decisive we are?! I can't even decide which Disney princess I would want on my spy team, let alone which style of dog house fits with my pet's personality best. Isn't that what Pinterest is for?

You know, these so-called "quiz writers" don't bother to include their credentials with their scam exams, so I don't think we need to look to these assessments as the final word on our God given gifts. I don't want just any old internet person to know what kind of Mac 'N' Cheese I should be eating right now, so privacy could also be an issue. And then there's the fact that I've never been a good competitor; I am more of the group hostess type who makes sure everyone feels welcome and validated while they are taking the quiz.  And besides that, how does one study for such quizzes? They just appear in my news feed without warning. Am I supposed to shut down everything and cram for the test on Project Runway All Stars? Whew, that is just too much pressure, so I'm just letting you all know that I will be opting out of this semi secret competition that very well could be destroying lives everywhere and forcing people to confront their pop culture stupidity. I am going to have to say no to the late night study sessions for the Elizabeth Taylor 101 quiz and my Brangelina IQ assessment. Besides, I have so many good books to read and such a small amount of time. I think I will just get back to my careful reading of The Rent Collector now . . . you know . . . so I can check to see if there is an online quiz on it that I can ace.

My Fantasy Diabetes Device

Today's Diabetes Blog Week prompt:  Today let’s tackle an idea inspired by Bennet of Your Diabetes May Vary.  Tell us what your Fantasy Diabetes Device would be?  Think of your dream blood glucose checker, delivery system for insulin or other meds, magic carb counter, etc etc etc.  The sky is the limit – what would you love to see?


Well, duh!  A cure, plain and simple.  And not the kind I have to get with a dual kidney/pancreas transplant where someone has to die to give me those necessary organs and I have to take anti-rejection medication for the rest of my life.  I want this cure in the form of a trip to Hawaii where I get to lie on the beach and have the cure "medication" delivered to me through a series of fruity, tropical smoothies and daily massages. Oh, I guess I forgot the technology part.  Well, that could be a fancy alarm system that would let me know when I need another vital massage or pancreas curing smoothie.  Yep, that's what I call a fantasy.

Photo of the Week

I bought this interesting item at Carrefour last week.  I was intrigued and confused by the barbecue flavor being advertised with the picture of two strips of bacon underneath.  The tag line that says, "with Vitamins" just makes me giggle, especially because vitamins is capitalized.  So I can convince myself that this is a health food item, right?  In Utah there is a potato chip company named Clover Club.  I wonder how they would feel about this competitor?

On a related note, have you heard the rumor going around Doha that Qatar will soon have pork products for sale?  Maybe as soon as January 2012.  They will only be sold to non-muslims, of course, but that will be a big deal if it actually happens.  I heard this rumor via facebook, so take it for what it is worth.  My friend, who is leaving Doha in January, posted that she went to turn in her liquor license at the one place in Doha where expats can buy alcohol (other than at the hotels) and was told that she might want to hang on to the license because pork is coming.  So I guess that means that buying it will require a liquor license?! Huh?  Maybe Katrina needs to give me a little more information on how it will all work. Either way, I really don't know what I am going to tell my Mormon bishop when he confronts me about being seen coming out of the liquor store carrying cases of products to my car.  It will all be in the name of the Relief Society Hawaiian luau after all. . .

I know they sell pork products in Dubai and you can get pork in some restaurants in Abu Dhabi, so this isn't unheard of in the Middle East, but it will be nice not to have to lug that frozen Easter ham labeled "beef" in my luggage after Christmas from the U.S.  Just kidding censors!  Calm down.  I would never do that, but I do know people who have.  And just so you know, the unique corn snack tastes nothing like barbecue or bacon.  In fact, it didn't taste all that much like corn either.  Ahhh, truth in advertising.

Doggie Discipline

Yes, this is the new technique in dog training that is all the rage.  Smudge and Freckles are especially rowdy whenever we have family prayer and scripture study, so Brett came up with this clever sit/hold that makes them feel loved while at the same time keeps them from wrestling and flailing themselves all over the office.  It is strange but effective.  :)

Ten Things You Should Know About Qatar Before Moving Here

Here are a few items that have been on my mind - items of wisdom for the newcomer to Doha.  Now this wisdom might seem very trivial and unimportant to many of you, but when you live in a country that is filled with ironies and the status quo is that everything MUST be done in the most difficult way possible, the little things start to become the BIG things in an emotional/mental health sense.  (wink, wink)

1.  Grocery carts are called "trolleys" and you need a lot of upper body strength to operate them.  The wheel action is archaic and they are not user friendly.  To illustrate this when I push an empty trolley I can push the handle to the side with one hand and the cart will turn all the way around in a kind of haphazard way.  This may sound fun, but trust me, it isn't a good thing for getting the cart to go in a forward motion loaded with orange juice and toilet paper.  Even though we have been here three years I still haven't learned how to operate them without much frustration and body pain.  I'm sure I am still quite a hilarious site to behold at Carrefour as I trudge my way down the ailes and stretch my whole body one way in order to turn a corner the other.  If I would only learn not to fill the carts so full, but whenever I go to the store I get as much as possible so I don't have to go back any time soon . . . but that is another story.

2.  There are VERY FEW left turn holding lanes here which means that you will be forced to make way too many "U" turns at round abouts and intersections and go way out of your way to get to a certain location.  Conserving gas is not an issue here, I guess, and conserving forethought is, at least when it comes to road planning, but to conserve my sanity I usually try and remain open to the option of NOT actually getting to my destination when I am out on the road and just returning to the safety and serenity of my own villa for an impromptu nap.

3.  REAL marshmallows cannot be found in this country.  I think it has something to do with REAL marshmallows containing some form of pork product.  Don't even try to make respectable Rice Krispie Treats with the local marshamllows to take to the Friendship Festival.  They will come out different every time and when I say "different" I mean not in a good way.  They are rubbery, rock hard, or just nasty tasting.  Just bring the good old Western Family brand from the U.S. and save yourself the grief.  But then don't make the mistake of getting involved in the risky Marshmallow Black Market here and find yourself trading your precious Libby's canned pumpkin for REAL marshmallows that some Texas oil executive's wife squished into her Samsonite last spring.  You might get sucked into the underground licorice trade next and then it will be all over for you!

4. There are many different people here in Qatar from many different cultures.  Our first months here were spent getting used to the mannerisms, personalities, and accents of the numerous foreigners.  Most of them know English but not the English we are familiar with.  For example, if you encounter someone from India, Sri Lanka, or Nepal and you have asked them a question, you might be mystified by the wiggling of their head from side to side (in a bouncy way).  This famous head wiggle is an expressive gesture and can mean YES, or I agree with you, or Yes, I would like that - similar to the western nod for agreement.  The Indian head wiggle can also be used as a greeting.  I have yet to master it, and I might need to have some tutoring from the guards at our compound, but one day I will get brave enough to use it and then these very good-natured people will embrace my blonde, lily-white self as a true sister.

5.  Speaking of culture, Qatari culture is very difficult to differentiate from other Arabic culture.  The food they eat here is mostly Lebanese, Turkish, or Iraqi.  Their homes are decorated with Persian rugs, marble flooring, and ornate, burnished furniture that looks like a golden peacock threw up all over it.  Their architectural skyline seems to be a Dubai wannabe and even the excessive use of white Landcruisers on the roads is prevelant in most other Arab countries.  We are still trying to find unique cultural markers that are only in this Middle Eastern country, but it might be safe to say that the new internet phrase of "That's so Qatarded!" that came about after the shocking news that Qatar had won the 2022 World Cup bid can only be linked to Qatar.  The sore loser countries that didn't win probably came up with the term to make themselves feel better, but leave it to Qatar to be the nerdy newcomer on the recess world stage getting picked on by the World Cup bullies.

6.  Turkey Central is not a restaurant featuring Thanksgiving dishes.

7.  If you hear someone talking about Sheikah Mayassa in Qatar they aren't talking about their dancing prowess.  They are discussing one member of the royal family.  BTW, she's very beautiful.

8.  If you burn your hand in a simple kitchen accident DO NOT put it under the water that comes out of the faucet.  You must use the cold water from the water cooler.  Water storage here is outside and therefore, all the water that comes into your villa is heated by the ferocious desert sun.  So in the summer we turn OFF the water heater and get hot water on the cold side of the faucet from outside and warm water on the hot water side of the faucet from the water heater - confusing I know.

9.  Some of the crackers that are available here might not be what you are used to.  For that matter, many of the products here probably WON'T be what you are used to unless you go to the very OVER-PRICED Mega Mart and pay about $8 a box for Special K cereal.  This package of saltines was the first saltine I found and that was this year.  The taste was not worthy of being called a saltine.

10.  If you are lucky enough to meet and get to know a genuine Qatar national you will find him/her to be very pleasant, accommodating, and generous.  They love to teach westerners about their country, their traditions, and their culture.  Just last month when my cousin was here from Germany and wanted to buy a ghutra and some other authentic Qatari clothing Brett asked his student Abdullah to help them.  He helped them by taking them to a rustic souq that sold Armani headdress items and bought my cousin all the items he wanted.  Now what is a German guy going to do with an Armani ghutra you ask?  Well anything he wants and in style for sure.  Now that is how Qataris are in person.  Don't even get me started on what they are like on the road.

There Are No Zs in Snoring!

Abbey:  Mom, why do they write zs above a cartoon's head when he is sleeping?

Me:  I don't know.

Abbey:  I don't understand why they use zs because there is no z sound in gwquaaaaaggggggg (how do you spell a snore?).

Lost In Translation

Last week we stopped at a local shwarma place to get some take out. We pulled up in front of the restaurant and one of the "waiters" came to our car to take our order (much like the U.S. in the 50s minus the roller skates). When we tried to tell him what we wanted, he had a very confused look on his face. He smiled a lot and went to get a menu. The menu wasn't a lot of help but it was entertaining. We scratched our heads with wonder and then laughed out loud as we realized that their "Meal Speed" section (middle of the page) is their FAST FOOD section. You can see that there is a "Bice with Grilled" section too - I think they mean "Rice." The waiter finally understood what we wanted to order as we pointed. Then while we were waiting, he came over to the car again and said, "English number one, but I no speak." Then we asked him to teach us some Arabic words. I don't remember what he taught us now, but I just love the fine lines of language translation and the comedy that ensues when we attempt to bridge those language barriers. So now when I don't want to cook, I just ask Brett to order some Meal Speed and the heartburn is speedy quick on the way!

Identities Revealed Volume Two

Okay, there weren't many guessers, but here are the identities of the mysterious ladies:

1. Lynn Millis

2. Lucille Wilkinson

3. Lorna Giggey

4. Rachel Hixson

5. Annie Hixson

6. Kate Smith

7. Ann Smith

8. Michelle Smith

9. Emma Hixson

Thanks for being such good sports, ladies!

Guess Who: Volume Two

Okay, here are some more fun pictures of friends and family posing in the abaya, shayla, and veil. Try and guess who these fun ladies are:

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A New Experience

Hey, when Abbey was about three she kept telling us that she wanted to move because she wanted to have a new experience. Well, moving to Doha has certainly given her that -- probably more than she bargained for.

Speaking of new experiences, I did something this summer that I never thought I would: drive a Jet Ski or Sea Doo or Wave Runner, whatever your preferred term is. Yes, at first I was hesitant as Brett coaxed me to get on with him and hold little Kimball between us as I made my maiden voyage. I was hooked and went with him a second time, this time remembering to take off my insulin pump first. It was a good thing I did too, because Brett dumped us. But that didn't dampen my new found enthusiasm. Brett was then able to talk me into driving with him on the back. Before I knew it, I was racing across Jordanelle Dam, daring the bugs to crash into my teeth as I smiled from ear to ear. It was freezing cold that morning, but the exhilaration of moving so fast across the water helped me forget myself for awhile and experience the thrill.

Then a few weeks after that first encounter with combining speed and water, the Reilleys invited us to go wave running with them. I hadn't planned to drive solo, but that is exactly what I ended up doing. Brett was on one wave runner and I was on the other. Then Lori and I went out together. I even got brave and did some "risky" turns. Abbey even ventured on the water with me. No, she didn't drive, but she did hold onto my life vest as I twisted us through the waves.

No, I wouldn't impress anyone but myself with my new skills, but I conquered a fear. Not everyone knows what it is like to have a diabetic reaction, so not many people understood my reluctance to be on a high powered machine in the middle of a large body of water all alone. Exercise and excitement can sometimes bring on these reactions, so my worries were not imaginary. I finally just had to tell myself that the life vest would do its job if the most terrible thing happened.

I'm so glad I let myself be coaxed and cajoled into trying something new. It was pure enjoyment, and the thoughts of those days skimming across the water will go a long way during the heated days of Doha these next few months. The family day we had at Jordanelle will go down in the Kearney History as one of the best. I don't have a photo of Kimball sandwiched in between Brett and me on the jet ski, but that moment is embedded in my memory forever - the first time Kimball and Grandma Dianna rode the wild waves. Thanks for sharing it with me little Kimball boy!

Pandora

I just have to post these perfect pictures of Ben and Mary's lab puppy. Her name is Pandora, but we call her Dora or Pandy for short. We love her so much. She is a sweet, sweet puppy and she stole the show at the parade on the 4th. The crowd wanted to pet her more than they wanted to watch floats and bands pass by. Since her name is clearly linked to the Greek myth of Pandora's Box, her new parents might be opening a whole new set of adventures. Happy Puppy Adventures, Ben and Mary!

The Identities Revealed

1. Marcell - and Daisy
2. Jalisa
3. Jennifer
4. Kristy
5. Jan
6. Mary
7. Lori
8. Donna
9. Abbey

Let me know if you want to play dress-up and have your picture taken!

Guess Who!

In order to show everyone the kinds of things we see every day in Qatar, I brought home an abaya and hijab. It has been very interesting to let my friends and family members hold and try on the complete public attire for a devout Muslim woman in Doha. They have been able to feel the heat and heaviness of wearing this imposed outfit. I can't help wonder how Muslim women adhere to such strict, seemingly oppressive restrictions. I haven't been able to talk in depth with a Muslim woman yet about her beliefs and the wearing of the abaya, but I know modesty is a big reason. Why black in such deadly heated deserts? Why do the men get to wear the cool white thobe? There are so many things I want to know.

I've taken photos of everyone who has tried on the abaya, so see if you can guess which mysterious ladies are featured here (Hint: both friends and family members are included). The one with Daisy is a dead giveaway, but I had to include that one, because she was so disturbed with the transformation of her favorite person, she kept growling. Even the models might have trouble identifying themselves. I know the hijab is probably not on correctly, but I really think I will need to take a class to learn how to wear this unusual clothing to do it correctly. So, my apologies to any Muslim friends who might see this.

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Those Were The Days

Because I was pretty shy and socially awkward in high school, I didn't show up in many of the candid photos or the club photos in my yearbook. Well, that has all changed. I just found out about a fun website where you can transplant yourself to a past through photo magic. I just thought you might enjoy a look into my imaginary past. I transplanted a few family members as well. If you want to waste some time too you can do it at http://www.yearbookyourself.com/ Have a good laugh, but I want you to share what you create so I can have a good laugh too. Thanks for the idea Amy!